Problematic Prom Dresses

Like thousands of other high school juniors and seniors, my daughter is in full prom mode. It’s one of those rites of passage–an opportunity to wear a formal gown and splurge on hair, make-up, nails and, for some girls, a fake tan.

We took an entire day during vacation to go prom gown shopping; my daughter had spent considerable time online getting ideas of what she liked and where we could find dresses. The first store was an eye-opener for me; some of the dresses were unbelievably skimpy and provocative. Some people would label them 'sexy,' I prefer the word 'sleazy.'

As Amy was trying on dresses, I found it hard not to watch what some other girls were wearing. They were low cut, some had no back and the fabric was skimming their butt cheeks. Cut outs are a big trend so you get to expose flesh along your mid-section.

Then, to my horror, one girl came out wearing what I can only describe as a bra attached to a skirt with a beaded string. The girl was thrilled, she was clapping her hands together saying, “This is the one!” and her mom just nodded agreement. If that was my kid, she would have been ordered back into the fitting room to take it off.

The too-sexy gowns have become a real problem in some school districts–such as Southington and Danbury–and some principals are taking a drastic step–they have created a prom dress code, complete with photos of acceptable and unacceptable dresses. They don’t expect the kids to dress like nuns, but they will refuse entry to girls showing too much skin, front, back or side.

The Today Show ran a segment about the dress codes on Saturday morning and one mom explained that she thought it was a great idea because they can now refuse to buy those kinds of dresses and use the school as the reason.

That’s my issue with the dress codes. Maybe if more parents told their kids no, they would not have to hide behind the school. What message are we sending our 16-, 17- and 18-year-old girls if we let them dress in an overtly sexy manner? I know they are bombarded with images of celebrities wearing sexy gowns on the red carpet, but as adults, we know that these celebrities are selling something; a movie, an album or a reality show. Dressing this way makes sure they get attention. Do you want your child talked about because of how much skin they were showing?