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Schools

Bringing Parenting 'Back To The Basics'

Krista Surprenant says a simple approach to parenting is sometimes the most effective one.

“If all we need to know we learned in kindergarten, then why bother with school all those other years?”

I am sitting at home now instead of teaching in school because I am on maternity leave. I am getting caught up on news, and this seems to be some crazy times we are living in. I’ve also started thinking about the directions that I hear myself and my husband give our toddler every day, sometimes multiple times per day. We tell him to put away one toy before getting another, or we ask him to put his cups and bowls in the sink to be cleaned.

It got me thinking about our students in school and the importance of teachers and parents being joined on this common front of “getting back to basics”.

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Most people have at least heard the shortened version of “All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten” by Robert Fulghum. You may have seen it on posters, t-shirts, mugs, etc. This saying should send a powerful message to educators and parents on the importance of early schooling. While every grade level builds on the prior ones, it is important to get back to basics in this modern age. There are many aspects of life that he addresses. However, for now, I want to address just a few.

The author of this famous quote tells us to remember priorities such as:

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  • Sharing.
  • Playing fair.
  • Don't hit people.
  • Put things back where you found them.
  • Clean up your own mess.
  • Don't take things that aren't yours.
  • Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.

These seem simple to follow, yet looking around, it seems that so many have forgotten what they learned in kindergarten. As parents and educators and even coaches, it is our responsibility to help the children in our lives, no matter what age, learn these top priorities. I think that many of us with younger children do focus on these priorities. However, they need to keep being reinforced throughout every age.

When our children are getting older and more independent, it is even more imperative that we keep them focused on these simple instructions. As our children get older they will find themselves in a variety of situations, which all are based on these rules. In many of these situations, we will not be with the child to guide them directly. In school, we use assemblies, field trips or class discussions to address some of these ideas.

Think of the power of these words. I believe that if this saying was kept a key focus in our homes as well as our schools, we would make a more significant mark in areas such as bullying, harassment, and drug and alcohol use, just to name a few.

Some quick tips for parents:

  •  Look for local volunteering opportunities that your family can get involved with.
  • Get to know the parents of your child's friends and keep an open communication with them.
  • Have an agreed upon check-in system with your child for when they are out.
  • Institute a family dinner time. This is a great opportunity to just talk with your kids. If it is difficult to have one every night, just pick one or two nights that the family can sit down together to reconnect.
  • Have a family game night once a month. Pull out those board games from the back of the closet.

There are those who constantly verbalize the old cliché, kids will be kids. However, as the adults in these kids’ lives, it is our responsibility to be the conscience or the angel on the shoulder. This does not mean that we have to be intrusive, but we do need to be involved.

Parents' homework assignment this week:

I challenge you to start with the family dinner.

If you do not already have family dinner in your household, try to work in a few this week and try it out! You can cook together, get takeout together, anything, as long as it is done around the table. You do not have to force conversations, just let the stories and ideas flow.

To learn more about Robert Fulghum, check out his website.

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